Energy and Success

There's a virus going around this season that produces mild cold symptoms along with severe energy drain and exhaustion. I just found this out from a client of mine who happens to be a nurse, and I can't tell you what a relief it is to have an explanation for how completely tired and unmotivated I've been this week. Sure, I have a cold, but it still feels a little wimpy to lay around in bed all day with minor systems. I decided since I haven't been sick in a long time, I must have lost the ability to "handle" even a minor cold.

Why am I sharing this story? Because it's a perfect example of how we discount the important role our energy level plays in our ability to be productive, motivated, and successful. Everything in and around you either gives you energy or drains your energy. If you have too many things draining your energy, you won't be anywhere near as motivated or productive as you can be, and you'll be more likely to procrastinate or otherwise "sabotage" your success.

The funny thing is, most action plans don't account for your energy level. When we write a plan of action, we assume we will be at a high level of energy during the entire execution cycle, and that's a set up for failure. A great example is an exercise plan. I might plan to walk on the treadmill 20 minutes a day and work may way up to running 45 minutes per day. After my first week I'm already up to 40 minutes per day and I'm feeling great! Somewhere mid-week two I don't feel like doing it and I figure a day off won't hurt. That runs into two days and when I get back on the treadmill on the third day it's REALLY hard to walk even 20 minutes. And so it goes. If I keep working at it, I might find that by week four I'm easily doing 40 minutes again. But even in later weeks what I'm capable of varies. It's not only affected by my mental motivation (my goal) and my physical capacity (how in shape I am). There's another factor that plays into what I achieve: my energy level.

Energy level isn't only affected by physical factors like colds, nutrition, or sleep. Your thoughts and environment also play a major role. Do you ever look at clutter in your office and notice a physical drain as a result? Do you avoid conversations with certain people because they take so much out of you? Has "just the thought" of a looming deadline ever made you feel like taking a nap? On the other side of the equation, do you ever notice how much more you can achieve when working with people who energize you?

If you pay close attention to where you get energy and what drains you, two important things happen. The first is that you can "stop the drain". Half the time we don't even recognize how many "holes" are in the dike. When you see them you find you can easily plug many of them up. The second thing that happens is that you can get better control of your motivation and productivity. If you realize you are low on energy, you can set lower expectations and take smaller steps towards your goals. When you are higher on energy, you can take advantage of that time and push forward.

We have an exercise in the coaching world we call "What are you tolerating?". The goal of the exercise is to come up with a very long list of everything you can think of that drains your energy. The things on the list can be anything, from a situation in your life, to extra weight, broken things in your house, a relationship, a pattern of thinking, anything that triggers a slight drain. Once you have everything on the list, you'll almost immediately see ways to lessen the drain. If you are up for the exercise, please do it, and feel free to share your "tolerations" list in the comments section, along with what you did after writing it, and how it impacted your energy. I'd love to hear!

Can you Love a Loser?

This may seem like a silly question, but in it lies one of the most critical secrets to success, both personally and professionally. So play with me for a minute.

Who jumps into your mind when you think of a loser?

If you feel a twinge of guilt and find yourself trying to shove those unkind thoughts from your mind, bring them back! Your thoughts wont hurt anyone, but not being aware of your own judgments will definitely hurt you! Plus, having some examples in your head as you read the rest of this article will help you apply it.

It’s important to be aware of what behaviors or characteristics point you to the label “loser”. Take out a piece of paper and jot down the top three to five characteristics your losers have in common – the ones that put them in that category for you.

Just for fun and personal insight, write the opposite of all of these traits and consider whether or not they are a reflection of your top values. For example, if you put “doesn’t take care of self”, does “caring for self” rank high on your list of desirable attributes?

Now, I want you to think about loving your losers. Not in a romantic sense, but actively seeking to understand how they see the world. What do they wake up hoping for and wondering? What do they think about and struggle with throughout the day? What causes them pain, and how do they try to get their needs met? What do they stand for?

When I ask you if you can love your losers, I don’t mean tolerate. And I don’t mean pity or have compassion for. What I’m asking is would you stand up for them, could you believe in them, could you accept the life they have created for themselves and actually see something intriguing, interesting, or enjoyable in it?

Be honest, and pay attention to your answer!

It provides the key to reaching YOUR highest potential. Why? Because what you are extending outwards is usually about as much as what you are extending inwards. Everyone you interact with is a mirror – what you see in them exists in you as well.

The losers of the world are your greatest gifts, because they show you the parts of yourself you haven’t yet accepted and embraced.

You have probably have heard that believing in yourself is one of the most important keys to success. You may have also heard that confidence and self-esteem come from unconditional self-acceptance. Most people agree with the concept in theory, but living it is another story.

I think the biggest fear people have is the idea that if they accept a negative characteristic inside themselves it means they are condoning it. I don’t think self-love is about that at all. I think it’s about seeing the value in the “negative” parts of yourself, and using ALL of yourself to create what you want instead of relying ONLY on the positive traits.

My husband is into golf, so I find myself watching Tiger Woods and Phil Michelson play a lot. They are the greatest players today, and you know what I notice? How many times they fail. I so admire that they can get up there and fail in front of the world over and over again, yet stay focused and keep going after wins. THAT’s what makes them the best. Look at any sport and you’ll see the same pattern.

In life, these patterns show up as well:
· Are the most responsible people really responsible all the time? Or are they the ones who don’t let their irresponsible moments get the better of them?
· Are the kindest people incapable of being hurtful? Or do they consistently work to be aware of how they impact others, and take responsibility for the times they are hurtful?
· Do the most successful business people always win, or are they the ones who have failed enough so they know how to turn things around?
· In sales, who has survived more rejection, the star sales people or the average ones?
· Are the smartest kids really smart all the time, or are they simply more intrigued and curious about the stuff they don’t yet understand?

Part of what holds us back from success is fear of failure, and even deeper than that, fear of BEING a loser.

If your fear of being a loser disappeared, what would be different for you? And how would that impact your life?

Think about it – can you love a loser?

Copyright ©2008, Nahid Casazza, Aspyrre